Confidence with the unknown

Welcome. I’m glad you’re here.

As we make our way through this health crisis we face so many unknowns from every direction. Unknowns can be a great source of invention, too many of them can overload our decision making. I think we all feel a little overloaded right now, I know I do. Overloaded on anticipation and the unknown. Constantly vibrating between Om and Hyper Vigilance....

I was editing images and I came across a development sequence of a Peonies composition. Later it struck me; there were the unknowns again. There in that sequence, staring me right in the face. My mind went right back to the making of that painting and all the unknowns and decisions it contains. I realized that I often feel a similar sense of anticipation of the unknown when I’m painting.

Now being in my studio painting is a much safer setting for unknowns. Still there must be some lesson I can carry forward from this? Returning in my mind to the creation of this painting, I see in myself a willingness to encounter the unknown, and a confidence that any perceived mistake could easily be wiped away and redone.

So, how does one create a similar sense of confidence outside the studio, where life cannot be wiped away and redone so easily? I haven’t found an absolute answer yet. However one thing I have been focusing on while I work is being mindful of the changes that happen during the creation of a painting. Very often such a great distance is covered from first marks, to the finished piece. A distance large enough that if you thought too much about it, you might never start. 

As I said no absolute answer yet, but this is what I’m finding:

If I can focus on trusting in the process and finding confidence in the studio, then the next step would be bringing that confidence to other parts of life. 

Sincerely,

JB

Here is a slideshow of the painting in process: